"When we begin to value who children are (not just what we want them to be), a shift happens in the way we think about learning and teaching.

   "Our jobs become more engaging and fulfilling, and we begin to envision a larger purpose for our profession.”  

~ Deb Curtis

​​​​​Materials & Resources for Social Emotional and Life Skills Development




TEACHER INSTRUCTIONS:  Be sure to familiarize yourself with all the questions before starting the peer group discussions.  Show first picture, wait a few seconds ... then ask:

1.  Who will take a turn telling us what’s happening in this picture?

2.  Does it look like these kids are having fun?  Why is that your answer?

3.  Does it look like they feel happy? Why do you think that? 

4.  When people are fighting, do they listen to each other?  Why do you think that?

5.  Raise your hand if you were ever in a fight and you wished the other person would listen to what you were trying to say.

6.  How did it make you feel when the other person wouldn’t listen to you?  Tell us more about your answer.  Who else will share about a time when someone wouldn't listen to you?

7.  Did you ever fight with someone and not listen to what the other person was trying to say to you?  How do you think that made the other person feel? Why do you think that?

8.  How do people act when they’re being STUBBORN? (Possible answers, but only if none of the kids can provide a definition: Staying the same. Won’t change. Won’t listen to other ways of doing things. Aren’t very fun to play with.)

9.  When people are STUBBORN does it get them what they want?  Who will share a story about a STUBBORN person they know?  (It could even be about a time when you were STUBBORN.)

10. What is the girl in the polka dot dress doing?  Did any of you ever stick out your tongue at someone?  (It could be fun and funny if the teacher would admit doing this as a kid... or not.)

Scroll down this page for  *another way* of doing things.

During peer group discussions, let the kids come to all their own conclusions (about right/wrong, should/shouldn't, etc.)

​​​TEACHER INSTRUCTIONS:  Show 'other way' of doing things, wait a few seconds, then ask:

1.  What’s the least number of people it takes to have a fight? (After the kids answer, teacher can hold up 2 fingers.)  So, if one of the people that is fighting decides not to fight, then what? (After the kids answer, teacher can pull down one finger.)  Can there still be a fight with only one person? Why is that? 

2.  I hope the girl in the yellow dress didn’t just walk away.  I hope she said something before she stopped fighting that helped the other kid understand why she was leaving. Who has an idea about something the girl in the yellow dress could have said before walking away from the fight? (Possible answers: “Let’s stop fighting now.  I’ll see you tomorrow and maybe we’ll feel better.”  OR, “You’re my friend and I don’t like fighting with you.  Maybe we need ‘time out’ from each other.”)

3.  Did you ever have a fight with someone, and then after a ‘time out’ it was easier for you two to talk and not fight?  Who has a story about a time like that you’d like to share with all of us?

4.  If two people fight more than they have fun together, does that seem like a happy friendship?  Who thinks people who fight more than they have fun together need a lot of ‘time outs’?  Why do you think that?

5.  How does fighting make you feel? Tell us more about how it makes you feel.

6.  How does it feel to stop fighting, make up and be friends again?  Tell us more about how it makes you feel, please. 

7.  Who has a story about making up with someone you were fighting with?   Tell us how you made up.  Who said what?  Did anyone say, “I’m sorry?”  When someone tells you they’re sorry, how does that make you feel?

8.  Did you ever tell someone you were sorry, but you didn't really mean it?  How did that make the person feel?  How did it make you feel?

9.  What did you two do after you made up ... when you were all done fighting?

Start KIDS' OWN WISDOM peer group discussions by telling the children you'd like to ask some questions to learn more about them.  Explain that you'll be listening more than talking, then ask if they’re OKAY with that.   (They always say, ‘Yes,’ but it’s a nice introduction.)